i love spicy food…. but when it comes to mouth wash, im a huge pussy.

usually people are shocked when they find out im a gold star lesbian and i dont understand why. do i LOOK in any way that i would ever have a man near me or my body? nahhhh braaah… NAH. i have known my whole life who and what i am….even at a very young age. and i think thats amazing. cause there are people STILL at this age who dont know. i always knew a “straight” relationship was never something that enticed me, i always had little crushes on my friends who were girls since… god…. forever. the only boy i ever let “date” me was a guy who had lesbian moms…. and then one day he called me “baby” and i was like NOPE… gata go.

also…when i was just entering HS and stuff i personally felt we were all wayyyy too young to be involved with sex and all that stuff so i didnt want any part of it anyway…..

this was a much longer blabbbb then i thought it would be

bottom line… gold star lesbo here…..im surprised some people are surprised. the end.

you know how when you close your eyes and rub them, that you can see like…. stars and stuff??

well… when i was a kid, i thought that meant that i had some type of psych super hero power and that the stars were trying to talk to me threw my mind…..yea

my kitty, ginger, i got when i was 9 (along with her sister whom is no longer with us </3) …… I named her after the spice girl…. yep….. she’s literally a huge chunk of the 90’s

i use this line alot … ” I’ve been gay ever since i was a zygote” ….. i assume everyone knows what a zygote is right? ….. cause if not then iv had alot of people confused with one commonly used Dani sentence.

when i take a bath, i leave the drain unplugged half way and the water continuously running because i like the water sounds and hate the silence.

one time when i was a young kid… maybe in like 3rd grade. i hung a 50 cent poster over my bed…. My parents made me take it down within .5 seconds.

the last time i had a throat culture was when i was 18 because that was the legal age i could REFUSE a throat culture 

the one thing that never fails to make me cry every time, is thinking about my cat and how much i miss her. she was my everything. she was by my side 24/7. her love and care was unconditional. you cant find that in a person. i miss you babygirl. i still dream about your little dopey face <3

they should have just made carly and sam girlfriends cause they would have been an adorable couple.

my life is so utterly insane that you can be DAMN sure that i will be pitching it to lifetime.

i like there to be extra pasta left over for the next day so i can fry it in olive oil…..yeah

there was a time where i thought “FTW” meant “fuck the world” ….

if you have to ask “am i being the annoying weird old guy right now? haha”

….you are probably being the annoying weird old guy right now

my dear friend Kristen just reminded me…..

one day in one of our indesign classes …i decided to google red lobster cause i was so hungry… then i proceeded to post it on facebook so i could show my friends in the class what i wanted to eat at the moment.